Humpty Dumpty has his Moment.

NOTE: It's April the first which means a few things. We're almost a quarter of the way through the year. Finally it's truly spring here in the Northern Hemisphere. It also means that the debut issue of Prim Magazine was let out of the bag today. So in honour, I've pieced together the scraps that ended up on the cutting room floor!

The trouser hierarchy is ever changing with skinnies, bootcut, tailored and numerous other cuts all nudging each other away from 1st Place. But it looks like again Humpty Dumpty shall for once have his moment in the form of androgynous trousers. This time proudly placed at the top, without that great fall..

When I started to notice super skinny jeans popping up in magazine editorials a few years back, moulded like vacuum packaging to the legs of prancing models I had a light bulb moment and decided this was a perfect shape for me.

Now, I’m not one to brag, but my trouser CV reads rather well. There were my Pocahontas leggings aged 6, then a flare stage aged 10 when I seemed to indulge in a solo competition with myself, always on the lookout for a pair of trousers covering more surface space squared than a Tokyo apartment.

After that I moved into inevitable boot cut territory which is why to me, as a 13 year old, the skinny jean held new prospects, perched at the top of the trouser hierarchy, oozing rock star connotations and giving me the urge to channel David Bowie in his post-Glam phase.

Four years down the line, what was a solid relationship is one that is now showing the kind of cracks that no polyseal can possibly cover, and I feel restricted and bored. I understand all too well the kinds of sacrifices Rod Stewart must make.

Cue a new fit to add to the resume; the polar opposite of skinnies. They’re sadly somewhat unnameable; a hybrid of styles; but Bryan Boy has given them the perfect guise; “Humpty Dumpty Pants”. They’re grown up yet borrowed from the boys, with a frumpy element that never looked so sexy. Humpty Dumpty’s are high-waisted, ankle skimming, vaguely baggy arsed at the top and slim at the bottom. A recipe for disaster according to the “fashion rules” but bizarrely appealing and they give the freedom those skinnies never cared much for. Oh, and they look killer with slick, glossy accessories for a power look, an update of 80s flavour.
Especially when the bottoms are turned up, they get on like a house on fire with your favourite ankle boots and look bloody marvellous with a clean white shirt tucked in.

Last season’s designs at Yves Saint Laurent induced me to let out more than a squeal of excitement. The whole collection was full of tailored trousers, perfectly crafted to give women some freedom and cut with an injected edge of androgyny. The same shape has come back out to play for Winter with variations across the board from Louis Vuitton to Nina Ricci and Preen, and thank God. Let the evolution of the trouser continue.